Monday, January 27, 2014

dreaming

I don't know where to start on this post.
Its about church.
Or rather a sermon I heard in church recently.
My husband says its the best hour of his week.
More times than not
I leave church in tears
because it felt like the minister
was preaching right to me
during his sermons.
As if God had whispered in his ear
what He needed me to hear.
I haven't left in tears though for a while.
Lately during the sermons
I'll admit my mind has wandered.
Thinking through to do lists and such.
Not good right?
Recently though he started
a new series called
"that's what dreams are made of"
and my ears definitely perked up.

You know that I'm trying to figure out
my new life...
a little background if you're new here.
I worked outside the home full time
before all my baby boys
changed my world
with their heartbeats.
I gave up working outside the home
when the twins were four months old.
We added another ball of energy four years later.
I don't know how we all survived
their "little" years
but we did,
{though not always gracefully}
and now they're all in school full time.
I'm still not working outside the home.
I'm blessed that I have this problem I know,
but I'm trying to figure out who I am again
since I do not,
repeat,
do not
want to go back into the lab.
No thank you.
No more chemistry for me.

So back to the preacher man...
here's where I sat up straight
and thought He was talking to me
when he {the minister}
 laid this all out in his sermon
by asking...

What are you all about?

What do you love?

What will you do "someday"?

What is your deepest desire?

Um, is it a bad thing
that
 I don't know the answers
to the above questions?
Anybody else lost with me?

He continued...

What blesses you?

What makes you happy?

Where does your dream meet God's purposes?

I'm sure I'm not the only one
who doesn't think they know
what their purpose in this world is.
Just as I was thinking that he said...
{drumroll please}
your purpose is where
"our deepest gladness
and the
world's greatest need intersect."

Pretty deep huh?
Yep.
I'm still lost.

For me,
the only possible answer
to the question
of my purpose
is to be
the best parent
I can be.
Period.
Nothing else matters.
No career,
no amount of money,
nothing.

BUT

I don't think that precludes having a career.
How could it?
All my working friends out there
are a testament to that.
But they have their careers.
They know what they want,
they're out there doing it all.
Me?
I'm confused.
I'm putting this all out there since
maybe you are too.
Maybe you're in a career you don't like
and you want to do something different.

Let's break it down.
What do you want to do?

What brings you joy?

What would you do if you could?

Even if you're confused like me
there is
good news.
Here it is...
You are never too old to dream.
I repeat...


You are NEVER too old to dream!
via

So this is what I'm going to do.
I'm going to really think about
the answers to the questions
set forth above.
You can too.
Now who's with me?




 
 

6 comments :

  1. Great post. I am in the same boat. I feel like I have no direction in my life and the things that bring me the most joy are out of my reach due to time constraints or money constraints....my life right now primarily revolves around everything I HAVE to do and not much of what I WANT to be doing. And I'm just stuck in it...don't know how to get out of it. My dreams are only dreams...I don't think they can be a reality for me. I need to focus on all of my blessings and somehow be happy with where I am and what it is have to do. Thank you for your honesty....it's comforting to know there are others out there trying to "figure it all out."

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    Replies
    1. Hi Christine! {hugs} don't give up on your dreams. I know you have kids to get through school and college. I keep telling myself that I can dream big in a little over a decade when mine have flown the coop {there will be no failure to launch allowed in this house :) } it may take some time but I believe if you dream it you can make it happen :) I believe in you!

      xo,
      nancy

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  2. Hi Nancy! Great post. :-) I had a quick question and was wondering if you could email me when you have a second. Thanks so much! Hope you have a great week.

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  3. Hi Cameron,

    I clicked through your name but I'm not a member of google plus so I cant see your email. Technically challenged is what I am :) Anyway feel free to email me with your question and I'll get back to you

    alwaysinasouthernstateofmind {at} gmail {dot} com

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  4. Nancy! Found you over at Mary Ann's - love your kitchen redo! Just added you to my sidebar, been wanting new reads!
    I love your honesty and transparency of your feelings right now. My sons are adults now and I am a Grammie of a 15 month old. If you don't mind a bit of my thoughts on where you are (I actually mentor moms of young children at my church). Being a Mom is THE highest calling we women have. Our job/career is to raise the best little people we can and give them a foundation for life, that they should know without a doubt what is right and what is wrong and to stand firm in their convictions. I had dreams when I was younger but once the boys came, the Lord conked me over the head and showed me that I was in a new season of life and that being the best mom I could be was my focus. As a church girl, you know that our life is not our own, we are children of the Heavenly Father who has a plan for each of us and it is our job to TRUST Him in His direction for our life. He has great plans for us! Once my boys were in school I worked as a fitness instructor and personal trainer during their school hours. It pays off to be home with them!

    All the best,
    Renae

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    Replies
    1. Thanks Renae! I know you're right. I just need to remember that on the tough days. added you to my blog roll :)

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