Friday, August 19, 2016

southern state of mind

While we were booking the trip to Disney last month
I said sheepishly said to the hubs...
you know, if we're in Florida, 
we may as well rent a car
and drive up to Savannah.
Surprisingly he agreed.
Well, not so surprisingly really.
He knows how much I love my dad
and how I cry at the thought
that every time I see him
 it will be the last time.

I love my mom, don't get me wrong.
Our relationship is just complicated.
I know I'm not alone in this type of thing.
I read the most beautiful post by one of my favorite blogger friends,
Cindy Hattersley of rough luxe perspective
earlier this summer and I hope you go read it too.
Her post about her mom reminds me of my own.
I read her post just after my courage works class with Brene Brown
finished up this past spring,
during which I learned the trick
when I feel myself judging my mom or irritated by her
I chant internally...
"she's doing the best she can,
she's doing the best she can."
Even if sometimes its hard for me to believe.
I try my best.
The older I get and the more life has thrown at me
I realize I can't make my mom behave the way I want her to
or to be the grandmother I want her to be to my kids.
I can only control my attitude, my actions, and my choices towards her.
Plus they're watching me love her too.
Add to that I think karma is real.
I know in 30 years their list of my failures
might be judged in a therapists office.
I hope they can look past any of my crazy
and know that I tried my best.
I promise I do.
And so we continue to go back,
take my kids to Savannah
to show them where I come from,
to repeat every story triggered by a memory,
point out every favorite eating place,
marsh view,
relative cemetery grave,
any and every memory I can think of
in the hopes that one day they'll bring their kids
and tell the same stories to their littles.
 So we tacked on a little side trip to 
surprise my mom and dad
who didn't think we were coming this summer.
Unfortunately we missed seeing two of my sisters.
They don't live locally
and I knew it would be a pain for them
to drive in during the week.
We did see my sister Mary which is always a treat.
As long as I'm hanging dirty laundry out
I'll say that one of my biggest regrets in life
is that we weren't friends until we both had kids.
Blame it on the difference in age
or growing up in a gaggle of girls...
I don't know why really.
But I'll regret the wasted years until I die
because she's a gem.
I'll stop now because I'm about to cry the ugly cry
but you know me...
if I feel it I'm gonna say it.
And probably cry about it too.
I constantly remind my boys when they bicker
that they should save themselves twenty years of grief
and just know that the guy they're lobbing over the head today
is and always will be their best friend,
the one who will call their brother a bad name
then whoop somebody's tail for calling them the same thing.
Enough emotional stuff...
let's talk with pictures...

as soon as we hit the Georgia state line
I was glued to the window with my iphone...

I'll spare you but I have hundreds of marsh photos,
trying to capture the perfect shot
of clouds, varying blues of sky and water,
and green/brown marshes and tree lines.

Here's a new view...

of the Talmadge bridge
on our way to see framily in Palmetto Bluff.
{framily = friends who've become family}.
You know us.
The first thing we do is jump on the golf cart
and start looking at real estate.
Only this time we only had an hour,
not days,
since we made dinner plans
to join our newest friends,
the couple who invited us
on the trip of a lifetime earlier this summer.
We packed in a lot though in an hour.
We drove by the new Inn...

and the new church...

I'm not sure what was wrong with the old inn
but the new buildings look spectacular
as does this home going up right now near the inn...

loving the back porch
with its brick herringbone floor...

fireplace for cool fall evenings...

 and of course its haint blue ceiling...

 the powder room...

master bath...

 I wish I'd taken more pics but like I said we were in a time crunch.
I'll try to remember to post more once the real estate office puts it on the MLS.
Assuming a visitor to PB doesn't snap it up before it is finished and hits the market.
We left and drove down to a new area of development called Moreland
and on the way saw a little friend...

If I told you our friend got out of the golf cart and chased it
I don't think you'd believe me
but I have the video so you must.
Probably wouldn't surprise you if I said that
 he might be the one who got bit by the shark 
while on the trip of a lifetime in June.
I wish I could say allegedly.
But I can't. ;)
 My idea of living on the edge
is riding backwards in a golf cart
taking pictures like this
{while he's driving ;)}

We were a little late for dinner
but had a lovely time with our old and new friends.
After dinner we wandered over to the old inn
for s'mores at the fire pits.
Along the way I noticed a woman taking a shot of this view...

Now I've been to Palmetto Bluff too many times to count
but something about this view rang a bell.
I said to my friend
"this looks just like a photo I've seen on an instagram account I follow...
I stumbled around her name but knew the last name was george.
About this time my friend calls out to the lady.
As we were being introduced by our mutual friend
it hit me!
I said "you're not going to believe me 
but I follow you on instagram!
You're evygeorge!"
She was taken aback and asked me for my IG name.
I said "I'm southern nancy!"
She laughed and said in her gorgeous Southern accent
"I've been wondering who the HELL southern nancy was!"
It was the funniest thing I've heard in forever.
Who the hell is southern nancy?
Just a girl from the south who loves it from afar now.
And instagram knows it.
Because they recommended her account to me.
I'm so glad they did!
I hope to have dinner with her 
at the soon to open restaurant Atlantic
 {on the corner of Whitaker and Victory Drive in Savannah}
the next time we're in town.
If you find yourself in Savannah please go
and let me know how you like it.
I think its going to be incredible.

Sadly we had to say until next time and said good night.
We wandered over to the inn...

horrible picture but the moon was breathtaking while roasting marshmallows.
We woke up early the next morning to get back to our crew at my parents
but not without taking parting photos...

We always leave this place with a heavy heart
but know that one day we'll be back
and one day we will never leave this area,
it will be home again.
This I know for sure.
Until then...

"I could be anywhere,
In my heart I'm always there.
Where you know every body
and if you don't then you're still polite.
No changing who I am,
that's the way I've always been.
No matter what state I'm in,
I'm in a southern state of mind."

{from the song "Southern State of Mind" by Darius Rucker}


  1. What a beautiful post the sentiment and the images where wonderful. My husband keeps try9ing to convince this northern girl to move to Palmetto bluffs.. I just cant seem to leave the Tri- State but your post might sway me a bit!! xo K

    1. you're so sweet. warning...PB is like Mayberry in a way, magical, serene, idyllic. Just go for a visit if nothing else. Let me know if you do and I'll send you to meet my friends :)

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  3. WOW...such a beautiful post. I'm going to Florida on Friday...which I consider the south...even with all the transplants. All my husband's family and friends have southern accents and the Y'alls flow out of this California girl's mouth after a day or two. I want to go to Palmetto Bluffs some day!
    I think you are such a great mom, Nancy.

    1. Have a great time in Florida Mary Ann! Drink some sweet tea for me! and you should definitely go visit PB...would be an excellent destination wedding venue for your kids. just saying ;) and seriously you make me want to cry with your last comment. {{{{hugs}}}} i think the same thing about you! i hope we are as close to our kids as y'all are when ours grow up.

  4. Hi Nancy, I've been moved with your post. I have the same feeling each time I see my parents (maybe the last time...). Thank you for allowing me to discover the South. We were in Florida last week (Miami and Key West) and enjoyed it a lot. So different from France. Caroline

    1. Hi Caroline! Thanks for stopping by my little slice of internet heaven ;) I'm happy to share my pictures and my love for the South. Glad you enjoyed Florida :) If you're ever in America again definitely put Savannah on your list of places to go. Email me and I'll send you a list of must sees!

  5. Nancy you are so great at sharing your feelings without getting overly dramatic or judgemental. Your relationship with your mom sounds so much like mine...your comment on my post really touched me. I too have tried to break the cycle and have a wonderful relationship with my kids (32 &35). I have tried through my mom's death to better understand her. We all have our dents..I certainly have several. Just know that you are a great mom and your kids will forever value that.

    1. Hi Cindy! As always, you are so kind in your comments. I'm definitely dented :) and certainly less than a perfect parent but I'll die trying to do better. you're the best!


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